“Whoever does not love does not know God, for God is love.”[1]
The past
few weeks have been an emotional roller coaster for me, and for a lot of people, in terms of what’s
going on in our nation and the world. I
have been mourning the loss of nine lives of African-Americans while they were
studying the Bible and praying together at Emanuel AME Church in Charleston,
SC. Last Friday the Supreme Court ruled
that it is legal for all Americans to marry the people they love, regardless of
their gender or sexual orientation.
We’re also learning that at least
5 predominately black churches have been burned in the past week or so, with at
least 3 determined to be arson.. This
has all affected me deeply.
I think
it’s important to understand the particular sensitivities and passions that are
a part of who we are as persons. So I’ve
given this a lot of thought. As I was
growing up in rural Pennsylvania, a variety of influences worked together to
instill in me a strong sense of fairness and compassion. In the early 1970’s, I married an
African-American man, which would have been a felony in some states until 1967
when the Supreme Court ruled that restricting the freedom to marry solely on
the basis of race violates the central meaning of equal protection under the law. My son is biracial and identifies as
African-American. I have family and
friends and brothers and sisters in the Christian faith who are persons of
color. Because I care about people whose
everyday lives are impacted by prejudice and injustice, I need to care about
this.
I have
family members who are gay. There is
deep pain, sadness and regret over a
broken relationship. Loving parents lost a beloved child over words that were
said years ago.
Over the
years I have become friends with LGBTQ persons.
I have heard their stories and have come to appreciate their paths to
self-acceptance and understanding and living with integrity, as who they were
created to be. Because of my growing awareness, I am very intentional when I
choose words. I say “sexual orientation”
rather “sexual preference” or “lifestyle choice” to reflect my understanding
that they do not choose to be attracted to persons of the same gender, any more
than I could choose to be attracted to another woman.
I have
known a number of LGBTQ persons who have been in long-term, committed, mutually
fulfilling relationships. A former neighbor was the first person to cross
the street and welcome me to the neighborhood when I moved here. He and his
partner were fairly private, but casual conversations gave me insights into
their life together, as an older couple who had been together for several
decades. When he was diagnosed with
cancer, his partner cared for him throughout his illness until he died, as any
loving spouse would.
I am privileged
to have LGBTQ friends who are persons of faith.
Some of them are among the kindest, most loving and compassionate,
gentle persons I know. All of them are
like all the rest of us humans, with
individual strengths and weaknesses and quirks.
Their sexual orientation or identification is just one part of who they
are.
Since
moving to Dearborn 18 years ago, I have been involved with interfaith work and
have become friends with people in the Muslim and Arab-American
communities. I live in east Dearborn, so
my relationships with neighbors are interfaith as well. I am grateful for the relationships I have in
the community, for the graciousness and hospitality I have experienced. Because they are my friends and neighbors and
colleagues, I need to care about them.
In my
training to be a chaplain and a pastor, one of the questions I was taught to
ask is “Where is God in this?” Another
is, “What kind of a God do we worship?”
As a
Christian, I see myself as a follower of Jesus, who I believe “came to live
among us, full of grace and truth.”[2] Near the beginning of his ministry, Jesus
went to the synagogue on the Sabbath and was given the scroll of Isaiah, and he
read, “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to bring
good news to the poor. He has sent me to
proclaim release to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to let the
oppressed go free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.’ He rolled up the
scroll… and began to say to them, ‘Today this scripture has been fulfilled in
your hearing.”[3] With many others, I regard this as Jesus’
mission statement, one that guides my sense of mission.
Jesus made
it clear what is most important for those who follow him. People came to Jesus and asked him, “What is
the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus answered, ‘You shall love the Lord
your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’
And a second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these
two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.”[4] In a related passage in the gospel according
to Luke, a lawyer wants to justify himself, so he asks Jesus, “Who is my
neighbor?” Jesus responds by telling the
parable of the good Samaritan, in which the person seen by society as unacceptable
is held up as an example of a good neighbor.[5]
I see
practicing unconditional love as one of the most important parts of my life of
faith, and it is a test of my faith:
“Those who say, ‘I love God,’ and hate their brothers or sisters, are
liars, for those who do not love a brother or sister whom they have seen,
cannot love God whom they have not seen. Those who love God must love their
brothers and sisters also.”[6]
So why am
I an ally to those who are marginalized or oppressed? Partly because I care about people I
know. But the main reason is because it
is an integral part of my faith. I believe my Christian faith calls me to love and
respect each person I meet as a child of God.
God created them and loves them, and I need to love them too—even if I
don’t think they’re very likeable, even if I feel uncomfortable around them,
even if they make choices that are different from mine, even if they are bigots. My faith teaches me that it is not my job to
judge.
As a white
person, I need to care about systemic racism in our society. I need to care enough to commit myself to do
what I can to change things.
As a
follower of Jesus, who reached out in love to those who were considered sinners
or outcasts in society, I need to care about those in our society whom some
others may judge as sinners.
As a person
of faith committed to promoting greater understanding and cooperation between
people who are different, I need to do what I can to combat prejudice and
stereotyping.
In the
upcoming political campaign cycle, there are sure to be candidates who try to
gain votes by promoting divisiveness and fear of various groups. This is a
time of significant changes in our society, and people who think they can
promote their agenda by exploiting peoples’ fears will surely do so. We’ll all hear rhetoric about how we need to
fear the loss of religious liberty and about Muslim terrorists in our
communities. I am committed to do what
I can by sharing accurate information and thoughtful reflections.
In this
time when so much is changing, a lot of us will be struggling. Change is hard. We won’t all agree about everything. But we can all commit ourselves to be
respectful and constructive, as we work
together to build a society in whch we have “liberty and justice for all.”
As Dr.
Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “We must learn to live together as brothers [and
sisters] or perish together as fools."
Fran Hayes
June 29, 2015
No comments:
Post a Comment